me and birthdays have a love/hate relationship. i love celebrating. i love drinks, and candles, and to be the center of attention. hey, i like to feel spoiled. on the other end i feel myself aging. here i am, officially “late twenties.” what? wasn’t i just feeling twenty-two? for so long all i wanted was to be older, to be respected. now i’m afraid i have wished it away.
there is a certain stigma that comes with aging. okay, older/wiser got it… i definitely feel the ‘wiser.’ i have learned a TON in my twenties. if i think back to the passive little girl i was at twenty or twenty-one, and i almost don’t even recognize her. i feel like i have come into my own. i know who i am, i know what i want, and i for sure know what i do not want. i see growth in my financial responsibility, my morals, my understanding and appreciation for the world. an appreciation for life. i want to milk every moment of my life for all there is and all it has to offer. i want to experience life, instead of watching it pass by.
i do, still, feel a pressure. i think it may be a pressure i put on myself.. to continue to grow, to buy a house, to be successful, to be kind, to be a mother, to be present, to be free, to spread my wings and see as much and do as much as humanly possible. i want to change the world, i want to inspire girls to be their true selves, i want to be a cheerleader for everyone and their goals.
this is 28 i guess.
my birthday this year was actually wonderful. my husband, Brandon, surprised me by flying my dad out to Milwaukee to spend the weekend with me. i can’t tell you how emotional this made me. my dad and i have always been super close. he is the kind of person i can literally tell anything and everything to and will never worry about any judgement. he is a kind and loving soul, though he’d love to throw you off with his tattoos and band tees. to think about my dad, in the winter making his way to an airport for the first time in 30 years warms my heart. i think about my husband planning and coordinating it all. i feel loved.
we spent the weekend showing Daddy-o around Milwaukee. this particular weekend happened to be sub-zero temperatures, so that was fun.. we went to the public market, got tattoos, saw a comedy show, had a crazy good dinner, and got surprise tickets to a Michael Jackson Cover Show– SO GOOD.
bring on a new year.